Infinite possibilities for annoyance.

So i am now in my second week of studying arts at the wondrous institution that is LaTrobe University (and not a certain elitist/facist breeding ground that invites some to "dream large"). Now, so far this has only meant that i have gone through a couple "buy-5-get-one-free" cards at the coffee shop and meandered through the many levels of the library - occasionally thinking "its time for my one (of two) lectures today" and "good thing i have wednesday and friday off, this whole 12 contact hours is just painful". This was a good system. Nay. This was a FANTASTIC system. I enjoyed casually strolling into a remarkably fantastic politics lecture (though sadly missing the cinema screening in doing so - those pesky clashes) or watching my philosophy professor getting confused in the middle of his "Dr. Who/Timetravel lecture" because a slide involving a single Tomato came up in his powerpoint.

Let me just stop to properly document this moment of complete and utter win for you all. So we were sitting there listening to the scottish (thus amazing accent involving the use of the word "to-MAH-to" a lot) professor discussing time travel and the logic behind it and such. This did involve many a picture/whimsical talk about Dr. Who and the Tardis and did culminate in actually reading an exert of a text called "Who is Dr. Who's Father?", which was amazing. But to ruin it all for you: He is his own father. Anyway, we were going along quite nicely and casually - then BAM! the next slide is simply that of a red tomato. The lecturer looks perplexed, and after a few moments simply says: "this is a red to-MAH-to. It looks like a nice to-MAH-to. I would like to eat it personally. However, this doesn't explain why it is here. Maybe i'll remember after the lecture and time-travel back to this point and tell you all". HE then proceeded to look around to see if he "was sitting somewhere else ready to come up and explain it to us". And then he continued merrily along, stopping to laugh many times.

I love this man.

But back to the interruption of such amazing times like these. They were combined with something i like to call TUTES (or "tutorials" for those out of the loop). This is the "practical" side of the arts degree: where you talk and ask questions and balh blah blah blah. Now i don't have a problem with this system. Nay. It is a FINE system.
I do, however, have a problem with one person in my "introduction to screen analysis" tute. Let me tell you about unknown name girl (whose name escapes me and shall now be known as "Shitty Film Girlman" - Or the "SFG" for short). This girl - who claims to have "seen every movie" - unfortunately had the opportunity to introduce herself to the class today.

For you reading pleasure i have prepared a rendition of her little introduction for you (as i remember it)(please imagine a high pitched whine for the voice):

SFG: ILIKEFILMSANDITHINKI'VESEENABOUTEVERYFILMASIWANTTO
BEASCREENWRITERBUTPEOPLETELLMETHAT'STOOHARDANDILIKE
MOVIESANDFILMSAREGOODTOOBUTTHENI BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH AJSHDJKHADGGHSFGHJSVF*please note that now she has broken and begins to forth at the mouth and comment on other people's choice in movies*.

I may have exaggerated a little bit.

But the moral is that the SFG (who is not actually a "sarcastically friendly giant" - which i do wish she was) will infuriate me and ruin uni for the next 11 - 12 (i don't really remember) weeks. If i don't destroy her. So now i shall obviously design a poll where you shall all vote for the best method of destruction.


PS: I'm not actually going to make the pole because:

A) I've already decided that i will just put on Ben-Hur and she will die of starvation/dehydration/sleep-deprivation/what-have-you before the film will be even half way through (WHO MAKES A FILM THAT LONG?!?!).
B) Obviously this would cause an even larger feud between lovely AnnaHyde (or as most will know her now "CrapyHyde") and the equally lovely Mr. Fancy (or as we now know him: "Mr. Incredibly cool n' Fancy").